Welcome to the Home of the SnusCENTRAL INTELLIGENCE AGENCY.
The mission of the SnusCIA is to provide Larry Waters with inside information on anything concerning Snus. Larry only publishes confirmed information in his riveting articles and expose's.
The SnusCIA often encounters tantalizing information which can not be collaborated or verified by other sources. This is raw intelligence.
Some turn out to be absolutely true. Some are basically true with some inaccurate details, and some are out-right rumors, gossip, and conversations overheard in the Men's Room. Take all of these Intelligence Briefings with a grain of salt. Until proven otherwise, they are not considered complete or even factual.
The SnusCENTRAL INTELLIGENCE AGENCY is providing these Classified Briefings for the enjoyment of SnusCENTRAL.org Members and Guests.
On 5 September 2013, SnusCENTRAL.org was attacked by what are believed to be A nti-Snus Extremists. These snus terrorists were beaten back but not before doing some damage; especially to our Snus Forum. Mr. Web Developer is working tirelessly to bring us an even BETTER SnusCentral.org and our beloved Snus Forum. Keep checking back here for updates.
ONLY SnusCentral.org has been affected. The SnusCentral.com Snus Shop, SnusCentral YouTube, and SnusGear.com are all hosted by different companies and were not involved.
UPDATE 12/19: At long last, the New and Improved SnusCentral.org is Live!
UPDATE #1: The SnusCENTRAL Intelligence Agency (SnusCIA) has received information that Dr. Lawrence Deyton, Director of the FDA Tobacco Products Division (TPD) is to be replaced by Mitch Zeller J.D. The Source, speaking on condition of anonymity as they are not authorized to speak for FDA, states the changing of the guard will take place on March 4th 2013.
Mitch Zeller, most recently Senior Vice President of Pinney Associates, has a long history in Washington concerning tobacco regulation matters and breaking nicotine addiction. How this change of command will affect FDA's policies towards Modified Risk Tobacco Products like Swedish Snus and E-Cigarettes remains to be seen.
Late this afternoon, FDA has confirmed Tobacco Czar Deyton is leaving the agency. The FDA press release can be found on Forbes Magazines' website. There is no mention of Deyton's replacement but we have confirmed by two other sources that it will be Mitch Zeller.
The SnusCENTRAL Intelligence AgencyFighting the Secret War for your Snus
Silkeborg, Denmark: SnusCIA Agents in Denmark have discovered that V2 Tobacco is planning to release a new Nordstommen snus offering for 4th quarter 2012. This new snus is named Moe Unz' Jullsnus by Nordstrommen. Jullesnus, not to be confused with Christmas snus or Julesnus, is a tribute to noted snus video journalist and SnusCentral YouTube Producer Julls.
In a clever twist, V2's Uber-Director of Marketing attached the Moe Unz name to this product. While Julls is famous in his own right because of the classic snus videos he produces for SnusCentral YouTube, attaching the Moe Unz name to any product guarantees instant success and market domination.
We received this interesting note from our friend Niklas Trieb at Swedish Match North Europe AB:I have some exciting news from Sweden. In about a month from now General will launch a new product for the Swedish market. The interesting part is that it is a General with flavor. Of course based on the original formula with bergamot. This will be big news in Sweden because it will be the first General product in the market with a new flavor added to the original recipe.SnusCIA Analysts seriously doubt this is just General Mint for Sweden. This begs the question what new flavor could they have decided on? Why is Niklas so excited over this news?
General snus is an iconic brand whose roots go back hundreds of years. Any change to the core recipe for the Swedish market is quite revolutionary.
Why should American General snus users care if this new snus is being made for the Swedish market? Simple: any General Snus made for the Swedish market is also available through Swedish Match approved Internet Snus Stores....unless they come in a black pouch, thanks to the Snus Racists at FDA. We in the US may not be able to buy this new General snus at our local tobacco store, but we will be able to order it through our favorite eSnus Store (where legal, blah, blah, blah).More information and pictures to follow as they become available.
The SnusCENTRAL Intelligence AgencyTelling you stuff we know and others don't
The SnusCIA has learned that Swedish Match will be launching "The General's Club" for General Snus users and fans. The General's Club will not be launched until 18 Jun 2010. Despite this, the link in the below letter will allow interest snusers to sign up now and jump to the head of the line once the Club is opened.
The letter describes some of the perks to being a General's Club Member but the program is still evolving and will not be finalized before the 18 Jun launch. Our normal sources at General Snus are not talking and even our own Larry Waters has responded "no comment" to our requests for details. Very odd, that.
According to SnusCIA sources, Parliament Snus from Philip Morris International (PMI) is coming to a store near you; if you live in Russia that is.
There are two varieties of Parliament Snus: Mint Creation and Intense Creation. While Mint Creation is fairly self-explanatory, we're not sure what the flavor profile for Parliament Intense Creation Snus is exactly. Aside from some articles on sexual aids, SnusCIA researchers have been unable pinpoint what Intense Creation would taste like. It is also possible that the name could be the Russian equivalent of Strong/Stark/Sterk indicating a high nicotine snus.
Lidköping, Sweden: On Tuesday, September 27 2010 Grandma Unz, Chairman of the Board and majority shareholder of America's favorite Swedish snus store SnusCentral.com, died suddenly from causes as to yet undetermined. No succession plan was ever devised as Grandma was convinced she would never die. Her Last Will and Testament has also disappeared further complicating the issue of voting rights by members of the Board.
A hastily called SnusCentral.com Board of Directors meeting quickly disintegrated as the Unz family turned on each other in a fight for control of the centuries-old Unz Snus Dynasty. By late Tuesday night, a very new SnusCentral.com Snus Store had emerged; at least for the immediate future.
Accused of having no business skills including proper operation of a calculator, Moe Unz was blamed for destroying the profitability and future viability of the company. A separate investigation is also being launched into how much snus was diverted from the company for Moe Unz's personal use.
Despite impassioned pleas from Unz that "this is not my fault; I am not to blame!", he was immediately dismissed as Manager of SnusCentral.com. While it was initially reported that those supporting Moe Unz had been ousted from the Board of Directors as well, the SnusCIA has later determined that Moe really didn't have any supporters on the Board beyond the late Grandma Unz.
According to a SnusCentral.com senior manager speaking anonymously since he/she didn't want to lose their job like Moe, effective October 1st 2011, all shipping discounts and free shipping for volume snus orders will be discontinued. It is believed the 10% New Customer first order discount will remain but this has not yet been confirmed.
The pricing structure of SnusCentral.com will also change as of October 1st when an interim CFO and real accountants will be taking over managing the company's P&L. Depending how many rolls of unopened snus remain in former Manager Moe Unz's private snus chiller, retail prices are expected to rise October 1st as the new business plan is implemented. The September pricing and discounts will be honored for all existing orders being processed for shipment.
At this point, the SnusCIA is unable to advance any credible theories as to the future of SnusCentral.com and the Unzfamily. Police in Lidköping and the Swedish National Security Agency will not comment on the mysterious circumstances surrounding Grandma Unz's death as this is an ongoing investigation.
Moe Unz has lapsed into a coma after a night of excessive binge drinking, even by his standards. Doctors are unsure when or if Unz will recover. Since Unz lost his private health insurance upon being fired, he is currently undergoing treatment under the Swedish National Health Plan. As such, he is lying on a blanket in a hospital hallway until a doctor is available to see him. This is estimated to take between 6 to 8 weeks assuming he is still alive.
When contacted for comment by the SnusCIA hours ago, Larry Waters; Swedish Snus Ambassador to the United States, stated the following "Do you @#$% idiots have any idea what time it is in Texas?? It's 3AM, you #$%#$% !! I'm sleeping, for God's sake! Go away and don't EVER call me this early again unless Sweden is vaporized by solar flares or attacking alien zombies!"
Until October 1st, it is believed all pricing and discounts currently offered on SnusCentral.com will remain unchanged although we have been unable to confirm this officially. No further comments or information is expected in the foreseeable future at the request of police authorities.
The SnusCIA has confirmed reports of a clandestine Snus Summit Meeting occurring later this week somewhere within the United States. Snus Ambassadors from around the US will be gathering at an undisclosed location somewhere between Los Angeles and New York. We have not been able to positively identify the host of this historic snus conclave. SnusCIA analysts suspect it to be Big International Tobacco although Halliburton has not been ruled out.
Three hours ago, an intercepted communication between two of the rumored attendees revealed a shocking fact: the agenda for this snus summit is being withheld from those participating until they arrive! The communications are incomplete but can only lead to this conclusion. The first asks "Have any idea what this <garbled....> meeting is about? I doubt they're flying us all out just to say hello." The response was "< garbled...... > Maybe they want to surprise us?"
Georg Gundersen of AG Snus Aktieselskab of Assens, Denmark today confirmed the restructuring of their Sales and Marketing Department. Export Manager Thorkild Knudsen is no longer associated with AG Snus.
Alex Gundersen has taken over Sales and Marketing for all markets except the Faroe Islands and Greenland. Anne Marie Nielsen will be responsible for those.
Below are two 2011 Camel Snus ads anonymously received by the SnusCIA. For the story behind the posters, read Larry Waters' interview and article: RJ Reynolds - The State of Tobacco in 2011.
Snus news briefing from the SnusCENTRAL Intelligence Agency ( SnusCIA) for February 28th, 2011.
Thunder Coola, an Extra Strong cola flavored snus introduced by V2 Tobacco on January 28th 2011 has sold out in less than a month. Thunder Coola was released as a one-shot Limited Edition. V2 planned to make Thunder Coola a regular part of the Thunder family of snus products once their new much larger snus factory came on line later this year.
No one expected Thunder Coola to sell out so quickly, according to the Uber-Director of Production at V2 Tobacco. Indeed, the desire for a Thunder Cola flavored snus caught every one off guard.
"When a brand new snus is released, most snus consumers buy at most a few cans to see if they like it before committing to a roll" stated SnusCentral Snus Store Manager Moe Unz. "In the case of Thunder Coola, snusers were ordering multiple rolls on their very first order. This may have been because it was publicized that the January production of Thunder Coola was going to be a single run until later in the year. I think it also sold out so quickly since no one anticipated a Cola Snus being so desired."
For the apparently few Swedish snus lovers who buy these snus products via the Internet, some offerings from Gotlandssnus, Gustavus, Taboca, and the line of Olde Viking products made by GN Tobacco have/are being dropped by a number of Internet Snus Stores. The original Olde Viking products made at the other factory like Extra Stark Cinnamon will continue to be sold.
SnusCentral.com, BuySnus.com, SnusExpress.com, and an additional number of Swedish Snus eStores will be dropping the these and other products this week. With the proliferation of new snus brands, off-brands, and house brands, some profiteers have moved in for their share of Swedish snus consumers money. Other products no longer being stocked include some older names which have just lost their appeal to the new world-wide generation of Swedish snus users.
Tweet to @Mr_UNZ
You must be logged into facebook to view this content